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die
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Jun. 22nd, 2006 @ 05:18 am
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love is just a lie made to make you blue |
>From: user@aol.com
>Hello to all.
>
>I am planning a trip to Las Vegas soon, and have never played poker there
>before. Could anyone suggest a book or better yet an internet resource that
>would fully explain the proper etiquette involved in playing the game in a
>casino environment?
No need for that! I will explain fully.
First, when you win a pot you should gloat loudly and tell your opponent
how badly he played. Always be sure to tell everyone how well you play and
your strategy for winning. Always explain in great detail why you make the
plays you do. Tell your opponents how well you read them and point out every
little error.
Secondly, when you lose a pot you should throw the cards at the dealer and
in a loud voice complain bitterly to the person that beat you about what a bad
player he is.
Third. Always ask for new decks and setups and constantly complain about
how the dealer in the box "cold decks" you whenever he deals. Tell the current
dealer and everyone at the table you will never play on one of his downs ever
again and not only that he can't even deal the cards without making a mistake.
Even if he doesn't make a mistake wait patiently for some very minor infraction
and then loudly complain about his indiscretions.
Fourth. Don't forget to glare and stare at players and dealers and try to
intimidate people with your mean callous disposition. Constantly mutter under
your breath, always speaking just loud enough so people can hear the foulest
stream of obscenities that you can possibly think of.
Last. When you miss your straight, flush or full house or fail to make
two pair when necessary, cry like a little baby about how unlucky you are and
how you never catch any cards. Moan and groan about how unlucky you are.
Always complain out loud about the odds against your opponent beating you.
Never forget to mention that he had only one card in the deck with which to
win. Tell everyone how you can never catch a break. Let people know that if
it wasn't for the complete morons sitting at this table, you would be winning a
lot of money. Tell them that the world sucks, and wonder out loud about how
you could be so unlucky. Tell them you are the best player in the room, yet
you are still losing to a bunch of idiots that can't even spell poker.
All of the above are acceptable, desirable character traits for partaking
in any casino poker activity.
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 Current Mood:  aww |
yesterday, i sign into facebook and see that i have 1 new message. so i figure no big deal, another one of those group spam messages, and i check it. surprisingly, it was one of my old classmates...from 3rd grade back when i was in Madison, WI! how cool is that. so today, i went digging thru dusty boxes to try to find our class picture from 3rd grade. i finally found it! i tried facebooking the class, but only found two or three matches and messaged them. wow, i haven't seen or talked to any of these people for twelve years! anyway, i found some other cool childhood stuff like toys, legos, videos, piano music books, my trombone, my cool collection of coins/stamps, and pictures from wayyy back when all the way to middle school. in one of the pictures there is a huge bruise in the middle of my forehead from when i was hit with a baseball bat! hmmm, maybe that explains a few things... i found some other stuff i used to be interested in like hacking guides, anarchist's cookbook, and The Big Brother Game book. i wonder if any of that stuff still works.
oh yea, also today I AM STARVING.Current Mood:  thoughtful |
if i could live my life any way i wanted to, i would be a Samauri. honor would be my middle name. discipline would be seen looking in my eyes. my sword would be my strength.Current Mood: meditating |
| » New Year's Resolutions |
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- Get out of debt
- Don't smoke
- Spend more time with family & friends
- Don't skip class
- Don't procrastinate
- Work out
- Start jogging again
- See Jess
- Get better at pool
- Win a big poker tournament
Dec. 31st, 2004 @ 09:31 pm
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| » Cows |
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The cow crossed the street to go to the purple trailer by the lake but went bash bash and said MOO!
Dec. 27th, 2004 @ 10:51 pm
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| » time to quit |
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im gonna finish my last pack today.
Dec. 27th, 2004 @ 12:53 am
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| » quiz time! |
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Your Christmas is Most Like: A Very Brady Christmas |
For you, it's all about sharing times with family.
Even if you all get a bit cheesy at times.
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Dec. 25th, 2004 @ 12:16 am
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| » hihi |
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my dad wakes me up today to make me help him get the audio working on his internet video call, so i do that. i figure, i'm up, there's light out, i shouldn't waste the day!
i catch jbabe<333 online for a few before i go out. first, went to the bank, deposited a money order. then, shipped off some paintball stuff at the post office. went to wally's, bought motor oil, filter, and windshield washer fluid. next up, walpole mall. made a pit stop at the tobacco store to get a lighter. after looking at the zippos for 10 minutes, i decided i didn't like any of them and got a plain chrome one. hmm, then i hit up auto zone for some winter wiper blades. next, went to the shell gas station and got... THE WORKS: the best wash money can buy!!! it was so durty before ;x my car loved it. anyway, booted it home, had lunch, went to work on the car...it is WINTERIZED now (kinda). changed the oil, filter, added de-icing windshield washer fluid, put on winter wiper blades, added a spare tire in the trunk, changed over to studded snow tires, added air to the tires, and topped off the coolant. almost 5pm now, i made an appointment to fix someone in town's computer, so i'm about to go to "work." later, i'll prolly hang out with shanna.
oh, i'm leaving for a few days starting tomorrow (friday). going to new jersey with the 'rents to visit my uncle and aunt. then new york to spend christmas with some fam friends. i should be back by the 27th (monday).
don't miss me too much my adoring fans!
PS. IM STILL RELLLY HAPPY :):):)
Dec. 23rd, 2004 @ 04:38 pm
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| » BOOYA |
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WE ALMOST HIT A DEER TODAY
WAIT NO THAT DIDNT HAPPEN
BUT IM REALLY HAPPY
Dec. 22nd, 2004 @ 11:40 pm
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| » don't sit on my hat! |
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well, winter break is almost here. going home sometime on wednesday...
things from school that i will miss, in no particular order:
- making fun of eric the noob p and playing pool every night. we are pool champs now. do NOT mess with us!
- some crazy freak that keeps me up all night and makes me go outside in subzero weather at 5am to go sledding or more like rolling down the hill on trash cans with strangers.
- i2hub :( i will fill up my hard drive with movies before i leave...
- playing poker with all the old timers as well as a lot of new faces, good times.
- facebook connection wars, talking like gurlie gurls, and paper/shaving cream relationship with matt...love ya mah LiL sex kitten xoxo
- bumming guest swipes for about 2 months after i ran out in october. thank you everyone who participated in saving the life of one starving chinese boy for only 19 cents a day.
- making ryan come get me whenever my car runs out of gas or gets towed ;x
- getting trapped under my bed calling for help while trying to de-loft it by myself.
- digestive halo breaks with eric and matt. i am HORRIBLE at that game.
- "toastbusters" team training for paintball tourney...the running thing worked for about 2-3 weeks then we got lazy. we never actually got a whole team practice in either. it was either me and eric or me and ryan, but never the three of us. but we ended up placing 2nd anyway.
- going into noho to eat good food and watch awesome movies at the pleasant st. theater.
- doing donuts in the parking lot then driving around in circles running from the police.
- listening to the hilarious comments from the "process" in cs 320 class.
- rioting from the red sox beating the yankees and cardinals.
- playing hangman and pictionary with jbabe and eric p. gold star for ALMOST beating THE CHAMP. muahhaha
- having fun with PRS in physics with eric j "THE KING" and jesse.
- using all 100 OCMP swipes this semester. i am feeling FAT AND SASSY.
- skipping 2 finals and playing poker online instead.
- hott study dates with debbie-o.
- having wen pay for me at the movies, what a gentleman ;x
i just spent the last 15 minutes searching for my hat in the room. i thought it had run away for sure, but i finally found it under the sheets. apparently, it does NOT like being sat on.
Dec. 21st, 2004 @ 03:04 am
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| » TOASTBUSTERS!!!! |
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left to right - eric p, hao, ryan
who ya gonna call??? toastbusters!
Dec. 19th, 2004 @ 02:02 pm
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| » my world |
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Dec. 18th, 2004 @ 06:46 pm
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| » hopeless romantic |
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splinter in the heart
hurting me just a little
tiny bit all the time.
Dec. 16th, 2004 @ 11:50 am
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| » asdas;dl'sdf |
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WILL SOMEONE PLZ TEACH ME HOW TO WRAP GIFTS
i apologize now to anyone who has to put up with my horrible wrapping job >.<
Dec. 12th, 2004 @ 06:40 pm
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| » mooovies |
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Wen, Ryan, Nick, and I ended up seeing Ocean's Twelve last night. It was decent. Funny, but not as much crime stuff as Ocean's Eleven. I didn't like the plot as much either. B-.
Eric P and I are gonna be pool pros by the end of the semester. We have been playing for two nights in a row! Three if we play tonight!
Can't wait for White Noise to come out on Jan 7th. Check out the trailer: http://www.apple.com/trailers/universal/white_noise/
Who wants to go see it with me?? :D
Dec. 12th, 2004 @ 03:35 pm
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| » oop |
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So we ended up missing Doo Wop Shop's performance Friday night. Oh, well! Jeanette came down, and we played some pool with Eric P. Hung out for the rest of the night. Going out to the movies tonight with Wen. What's good out? Blade Trinity? Ocean's Twelve? Also, Debbie, Jeanette (if she's back), Eric P (if he gets some money), and I are gonna see Sideways at Pleasant Street on Tuesday night accompanied by dinner (maybe Thai? delish) and ice cream yummm (if i can find the place!).
Last day of classes on Monday. Finals coming up soon. We all know what FINALS stands for...
Fuck
I
Never
Actually
Learned
Shit
Well, I'm getting hungry and I'm out of swipes, so I gotta find someone to feed me. Peace.
Dec. 11th, 2004 @ 03:17 pm
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| » saddest star trek episode ever |
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Data creates a daughter android, and he fathers her, teaching her all about the way humans act and about human emotions even though he can't feel them himself. At the end of the episode, Star Fleet tries to take her away from the ship to study her, and she has a nervous breakdown. She says I love you to Data before all her circuits slowly malfunctions and she dies :'( It was such a sad episode! I have tears in my eyes ;x i'm so weak
Dec. 10th, 2004 @ 03:01 pm
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| » lalala |
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doooo woooop booo boooo boooo booo woooop
Dec. 10th, 2004 @ 11:41 am
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